Your two inch moment

How far are you from falling in love?

Photo by Kojirou Sasaki on Unsplash

My Big Happiness Interview with top coach Ian Sanders, author of 365 Ways to Have a Good Day: A day-by-day guide to enjoying a more successful, fulfilling life has just been published in Metro today. (Here is it if you want to read it.)

I loved interviewing Ian because he had me focusing on the baby steps I can take right now to make today a better day. (Starting to build my life from scratch from the ground up, I sometimes get so wrapped up in the bigger vision that I get overwhelmed and do nothing. What do I really want? What new direction will give me meaning and purpose? If I’m tired and grumpy, I think ‘I don’t bloody know’ and procrastinate by watching another episode of Succession.)

I love Ian’s book because he gives science backed and positive psychology tips on how to focus on your next 24 hours. He teaches you how to design your day to boost your mood, help you stay calm and stop you becoming burnt out.

Do one tiny thing differently

He also reminds you that sometimes to get what you really, really want, that you don’t have to change everything - you just have to make one slight change, accept one invite, go along to one event and then magic can happen.

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Two inches from ‘wooahh!’

Ian calls it the two-inch moment. He told me this story.

“When the co-founder of the animation company Pixar, Ed Catmull, was a child, his family was in a car accident on a winding canyon road. Two inches to the left and the car would have gone over the cliff. Two inches – no Ed. No Pixar! Just think. No Toy Story, no Inside Out, no Up!” says Ian. “In his book Creativity Inc, Ed describes this as a two-inch moment. Let’s tune into those events where you are two inches from misadventure and two inches from opportunity. So many of the trajectories in my life have been that close. Two inches from an 'aaagh'. But also two inches from a 'wooaah!'"

‘Marry me!’

When I asked Ian how that piece of wisdom had changed his life, he said that it had led him to the love of his life.

“On a Sunday evening in August 2003, the very last day of my ten-day internet dating trial subscription, I decided to check the dating website one final time. I guess it was one of those moments when I nearly didn’t bother (definitely two inches either way). The site suggested I was a good match with ‘Zoë from Streatham’. I clicked on her. She’s now my wife!”

Photo by Abhinav Anand on Unsplash

Change direction by two inches

I broke up with my boyfriend last year. I was very sad but now recovering nicely and interviewing Ian made me sign up to an internet dating site and I have just started talking to someone who makes me laugh.

It’s a start.

I can’t control the outcome but I can take a baby step.

Two-inches in the direction I might usually take (click on a dating site versus Netflix?!)

You don’t need to be single to be inspired by this advice.

What area do you want to change in your life?

Where can you change direction by ‘two-inches’ today?

Here are some other tips from Ian about how to have a better day:

• Join a club. Why are people who live in Denmark so happy? According to a survey by Aalborg University, nine out of ten Danes are members of a forening, the Danish word for a club or association. From winter-bathing to board games, it appears that teaming up with others to play or engage in a hobby keeps their happiness up. In a 2018 Eurobarometer survey, 79 per cent of Danes reported never or almost never being lonely

• Have a snack of creativity. Did you know that when you are engaged in creative activities, you’re in a relaxed state, so it sends a signal to the brain that you feel safe? You can use that to your advantage. If you want to get a safe, relaxed mindset – get creative! Even quick bursts of such activity are beneficial.

• Narrow your focus. If you were going to narrow it down, what is the one ingredient that’s sacred to having a good day? Is it doing a daily doodle? A mid-morning mug of tea? A yoga session? Walking the dog? Ten minutes of meditation? Laughter? A human connection? A run? Make it realistic and actionable. Write it down. Pin it up. Make a daily commitment to it.